And On The Seventh Day God Ended His Work & Watched "Curb Your Enthusiasm."

(H/T: HuffPo.)

It appears that Bill Donohue must have worn out his blessed DVD copy of The Passion of the Christ. Now he's watching HBO.

I mentioned the uptight, humorless Catholic League scold here the other day, and it looks like he still hasn't found his funny bone.

Why's the King of Catholics fuming this time? Blame it on Larry David.

Yup, David's fictional wayward peeing on a Jesus painting during Sunday's "Curb Your Enthusiasm" has Donohue pissed off again:

The self-righteous comedy critic was not amused:

Mention Larry David in a word association game and "Seinfeld" rolls off the lips. That show, which David created, wrote and produced, was brilliant. "Curb Your Enthusiasm" is not. Indeed, last night's episode demonstrates that David's best years are behind him. He ought to quit while he's ahead.

At one point in the show, David goes to the bathroom in a Catholic home and splatters urine on a picture of Jesus; he doesn't clean it off. Then a Catholic woman goes to the bathroom, sees the picture and concludes that Jesus is crying. She then summons her equally stupid mother and the two of them fall to their knees in prayer. When David and Jerry Seinfeld (playing himself) are asked if they ever experienced a miracle, David answers, "every erection is a miracle." That's what passes for creativity these days.

Was Larry David always this crude? Would he think it comedic if someone urinated on a picture of his mother? This might be fun to watch, but since HBO only likes to dump on Catholics (it was just a couple of weeks ago that Sarah Silverman insulted Catholics on "Real Time with Bill Maher"), and David is Jewish, we'll never know.

Pulling out your ol' anti-Semite card again, eh, Bill?

Anyway, HBO felt compelled to respond to Donohue:"

Anyone who follows Curb Your Enthusiasm knows that the show is full of parody and satire. Larry David makes fun of everyone, most especially himself. The humor is always playful and certainly never malicious. "

Conversely, Bill Donohue is never playful and certainly always malicious.

The Devil, You Say!

Ah, religion! Snake oil for the soul has many sleazy salesmen, but perhaps none as bitterly angry at this modern world as Bill Donohue. The Catholic League's apoplectic president is mad, mad, mad, and he's mad at the heathens! Donohue just knows we are going to H-E-double-toothpick!

So, all you deviant secular sickos, let's join HuffPo's Jason Linkins, who noticed that the Washington Post gave God's l'il gladiator way too many column inches as he rants at the evils along the Highway to Hell:

Did you know that "secular saboteurs" want to "tear down the economic structure of capitalism and replace it with socialism, and eventually communism?" They do, and they will do so by killing Jesus, and letting the Marquis de Sade have his way with the corpse, or something. And all of this perversion will be made into a movie, by Roman Polanski:

There was a time when Hollywood made reverential movies about Christianity. But those days are long gone. Now they just insult. And when someone finally makes a film that makes Christians proud, he is run out of town. Were it not for Mel Gibson, there would have been no "Passion of the Christ." But for every Harvey Weinstein who likes to bash Catholics, there is always someone else waiting in the wings to do the same.

Yes, it was just terrible the way Mel Gibson was "run out of town" with the assload of millions of dollars he made from his movie, Plan 9 From Nazareth, which was about Jesus and which should have allowed Mel Gibson the right to drunkenly denigrate Jews and call people "sugartits," just like the Bible says.

Anyway, Donohue is pretty sure that his side will win the culture war, ban gayness, and finally, maybe, get a Christian elected president and/or Christmas recognized as an important holiday:

The culture war is up for grabs. The good news is that religious conservatives continue to breed like rabbits, while secular saboteurs have shut down: they're too busy walking their dogs, going to bathhouses and aborting their kids. Time, it seems, is on the side of the angels.

This more or less explains why Donohue's house smells vaguely of dog shit.